We're all looking for answers to life's big questions... and of course life's little questions too. And so often, in our search for the answers, we tend to be very attached to the idea that there are a list of "right" answers, which can be applied in every situation - what to do to become successful, how to talk to your teenager, what to do to resolve a conflict, how leaders should behave, 7 steps to being happy, and much, much more. Wouldn't it be great if it really was that simple, if all we had to do is just learn a list of rules and apply the rules to every situation, to become happy and successful?! Wouldn't it be great if we only had to develop a marketing plan once, and we could then just roll it out from there, never having to come back and review our marketing strategy? Wouldn't it be fantastic if we could take a course or read a book on relationships and know that the answers we've read are the answers for all time?
Well, as much as we might delude ourselves with the idea that we can learn all the answers, if we just find the right book or course, life is too diverse, people and relationships are too unique, and the world is changing at too rapid a pace, for this to ever be a realistic expectation. I suspect that Einstein's views on "life's answers" are more realistic - and incredibly useful too.
Apparently one of Einstein's student assistants asked him, "Professor Einstein, what test are we giving the students this week?" Einstein replied, "The same test we gave them last week." Bewildered, the student assistant replied, "But Professor Einstein, we already gave them that test." Einstein patiently answered, "Yes, but the answers are different this week."
Einstein clearly understood the importance of life-long learning. People who understand life-long learning are more successful, because they keep reading, listening, watching, questioning and learning, and they keep evolving. They tend to also experience less conflict and more intimacy in their relationships - because they recognise that multiple perspectives exist, are more comfortable with uncertainty, and are less attached to their opinions being "THE RIGHT ANSWER."
Einstein is often considered the epitome of intelligence, for the contribution that his thinking made to the world of science - a world that's all about knowledge, certainty and predictability. The word "science" comes from the Latin scientia, meaning "knowledge" or "to know", and is described by Wikipedia as the effort to discover, and increase human understanding of how the physical world works. All scientific research is underpinned by the belief that there are rules and laws that govern our behaviour and the behaviour of our environment, and is an effort to discover and articulate these rules. This anecdote reveals an element of Einstein's success strategy - the contradiction of being able to pursue greater knowledge and understanding, whilst maintaining a loose attachment to certainty. Having a loose attachment to certainty is what opens the way to further discovery, creativity and evolution - what Rosamund and Ben Zander (co-authors of "The Art of Possibility") refer to as "living in possibility." Perhaps more importantly, since our beliefs play such a significant role in creating our emotions, having a loose attachment to certainty, and being able to change your beliefs, opens the way to emotional freedom.
So how can you practice living with a loose attachment to certainty, and experience greater creativity and emotional freedom?
1. If you're feeling bad, notice what your beliefs are about the situation you're feeling bad about. Write these down. For each belief, ask "Why?" a few times, to identify the underlying beliefs you're holding.
2. If you're feeling stuck and unsure how to solve a problem, notice what your beliefs are about the situation, and the possible solutions you've already generated. Write these down, and ask "Why?" to get your underlying beliefs.
3. Choose the belief that you feel is most getting in the way of you feeling the way you want to feel or solving the problem.
4. Question the belief, by asking, "Is it true?" Find examples of situations where your belief might be untrue. Find examples of other people who don't believe that particular belief, and get some of the results you're wanting in life. Ask yourself, "How would I know if this belief wasn't true?" Ask yourself, "Would I want someone else I love dearly to hold this belief?"
5. Notice: who would you be without this belief? How would you feel without this belief? How would you go about solving this problem if you didn't have this belief?
6. Brainstorm some other potential beliefs that you could hold instead. Start with stating the exact opposite to your current belief, then add any further ideas of ways you could adapt your previous belief, so that it's more useful. Finally, add examples of beliefs you think other people hold.
7. Evaluate each possible belief, and notice which of the new beliefs could be as true, or more true, than the previous belief you were holding. Choose to practice the new belief (or beliefs) that are both true and useful.
8. Keep reading, observing, and listening widely - this will give you exposure to evidence with which to keep evolving your thoughts and beliefs, so that they remain useful and support you to solve problems and experience emotional freedom.
What do you do, read, or listen to, to support your life-long learning, personally, and in your professional life?
Well, as much as we might delude ourselves with the idea that we can learn all the answers, if we just find the right book or course, life is too diverse, people and relationships are too unique, and the world is changing at too rapid a pace, for this to ever be a realistic expectation. I suspect that Einstein's views on "life's answers" are more realistic - and incredibly useful too.
Apparently one of Einstein's student assistants asked him, "Professor Einstein, what test are we giving the students this week?" Einstein replied, "The same test we gave them last week." Bewildered, the student assistant replied, "But Professor Einstein, we already gave them that test." Einstein patiently answered, "Yes, but the answers are different this week."
Einstein clearly understood the importance of life-long learning. People who understand life-long learning are more successful, because they keep reading, listening, watching, questioning and learning, and they keep evolving. They tend to also experience less conflict and more intimacy in their relationships - because they recognise that multiple perspectives exist, are more comfortable with uncertainty, and are less attached to their opinions being "THE RIGHT ANSWER."
Einstein is often considered the epitome of intelligence, for the contribution that his thinking made to the world of science - a world that's all about knowledge, certainty and predictability. The word "science" comes from the Latin scientia, meaning "knowledge" or "to know", and is described by Wikipedia as the effort to discover, and increase human understanding of how the physical world works. All scientific research is underpinned by the belief that there are rules and laws that govern our behaviour and the behaviour of our environment, and is an effort to discover and articulate these rules. This anecdote reveals an element of Einstein's success strategy - the contradiction of being able to pursue greater knowledge and understanding, whilst maintaining a loose attachment to certainty. Having a loose attachment to certainty is what opens the way to further discovery, creativity and evolution - what Rosamund and Ben Zander (co-authors of "The Art of Possibility") refer to as "living in possibility." Perhaps more importantly, since our beliefs play such a significant role in creating our emotions, having a loose attachment to certainty, and being able to change your beliefs, opens the way to emotional freedom.
So how can you practice living with a loose attachment to certainty, and experience greater creativity and emotional freedom?
1. If you're feeling bad, notice what your beliefs are about the situation you're feeling bad about. Write these down. For each belief, ask "Why?" a few times, to identify the underlying beliefs you're holding.
2. If you're feeling stuck and unsure how to solve a problem, notice what your beliefs are about the situation, and the possible solutions you've already generated. Write these down, and ask "Why?" to get your underlying beliefs.
3. Choose the belief that you feel is most getting in the way of you feeling the way you want to feel or solving the problem.
4. Question the belief, by asking, "Is it true?" Find examples of situations where your belief might be untrue. Find examples of other people who don't believe that particular belief, and get some of the results you're wanting in life. Ask yourself, "How would I know if this belief wasn't true?" Ask yourself, "Would I want someone else I love dearly to hold this belief?"
5. Notice: who would you be without this belief? How would you feel without this belief? How would you go about solving this problem if you didn't have this belief?
6. Brainstorm some other potential beliefs that you could hold instead. Start with stating the exact opposite to your current belief, then add any further ideas of ways you could adapt your previous belief, so that it's more useful. Finally, add examples of beliefs you think other people hold.
7. Evaluate each possible belief, and notice which of the new beliefs could be as true, or more true, than the previous belief you were holding. Choose to practice the new belief (or beliefs) that are both true and useful.
8. Keep reading, observing, and listening widely - this will give you exposure to evidence with which to keep evolving your thoughts and beliefs, so that they remain useful and support you to solve problems and experience emotional freedom.
What do you do, read, or listen to, to support your life-long learning, personally, and in your professional life?
2 comments:
Great post Cath.
For me its about having the awareness in those situations to step back and question that belief. Or at the very least finding the time after an event to go through this process of questioning.
Nicely put Cath,
My favorite Einstein quote is the one about us being unable to solve any problem on the same level of thought as that with which we created it. So the question is, just how far outside of our little paradigms do we need to go in order to connect with the appropriate level of thought to deal with life’s little challenges (and big ones too)?
I found the answer to be Authentic Self Empowerment – enabling us to connect with our own inner intelligence and motivating action in alignment with our true values.
But of course all roads lead to Rome…eventually.
Keep shining,
Jevon
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